Centerfield

Technically, this is not a joke, but it is funny.

At the casino, a beautiful young woman walked up and took a seat among the men at a dice game. When her turn came to roll, she explained that she always seemed luckier when half naked, and to everyone's astonishment, took off her top. Then she shouted "Let 'em roll", threw the dice, screamed "I win! I win!", scooped up the pot of cash, and walked off.
"That was incredible," said one of the punters to the croupier. "What did she throw, anyway?"
"Darned if I know," said the croupier. "I thought you guys would be watching."

OK, so I have a wierd sense of humor. But this devestating set-down of the President's presentation on his new Iraq policy hit my funny bone: he "looked like he was making a hostage tape."
http://sidewaysmencken.blogspot.com/

Even believing that an increase in troops (albeit a substantially bigger one than announced) might be the best course, THAT's funny.

wj;
I don't think you got the gist of the open thread.

wj,

Then you'll love this. (Note to the more sensitive among, us; the link includes a picture from Pan's Labyrinth which is not for the faint of heart.)

To Isadora, (if she's lurking out there)

Your Latin teacher sounds like one cool lady. I wish we had a chance to watch Monty Python during class, but the best we had was an elementary school movie of "Who Lost Lucius's Bulla?" *

BTW, the SciFi Channel has a premiere of Beowulf tomorrow evening. You might want to wait 'till November to see the version scripted by Neil Gaiman, though. He wrote a Beowulf sequel (of sorts) in his novella "The Monarch of The Glen", but you get the inside jokes better if you've read his book American Gods and his short story "Keepsakes and Treasures."

And Tully is indeed right that KISS stands for "Keep It Simple, Stupid", a rule that a lot of politicians would do well to emulate. (especially Dem presidental candidates, who have a frustrating habit of giving two page answers to "yes or no" questions.

Sorry I couldn't reply to your earilier post. I got caught up in the House pecking party, and by the time I found the exit, the comments had closed. My bad.

*My suggestion that we watch Caligula was shot down. ;-)

I think I read and hated American Gods. Could be misremembering though.

Who do you folks like this weekend? Against the spread, I like all the underdogs except Indy.

Straight up, I like all the favorites except SD. I consider SD-NE a toss-up.

5 weeks until pitchers and catchers report.

How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? Wave at him.

How do you keep a politician from drowning? Take your foot off of his head.

Do you know how few truly non-vicious clean jokes there are? Me neither.

:-)

A man had been stranded on a desert island for 20 years. One day as he was on the beach looking at the endless ocean a beautiful girl in a wetsuit swam ashore. She walked up to him, zipped down her wet suit a couple of inches, reached in and pulled out a pack of cigarettes.
"Would like a smoke?" she asked.
"I haven't had a cigarette in 20 years!" the man exclaimed. "You bet I would!"
After he had finished his cigarette the girl stepped a little closer and zipped down the wetsuit a little farther. "Would you like a drink?" she asked as she pulled out a flask of whiskey.
"Oh yes. Yes indeed," the man said, and took a long swig.
The beautiful woman sidled even closer and zipped down the wetsuit even farther. "Would you like to play around?" she asked.
"You got a set of golf clubs in there too?" the man replied.

want a good laugh Tully? Read this.......

truly non-vicious clean joke

what's the difference between a door?

an orange, because a vest has no sleeves

I still think this is funnier

OK, who stole my membership card in the Surrealist Non-Sequitur Society?

Hahaha and this one is funny when you take into consideration that even Iranians think their President is a threat. That would put the average Iranian right of the Democratic leadership who suggests dancing with nutjobs.......

Yes maybe they will "help" us in Iraq.

Okay, so in light of the above link, here's a clean joke (except for its subject)

Chavez to his wife: "Guess who's coming to dinner tonight?"

Hey, I consider him a threat; I just consider W a greater threat. The reason? I don't know if Iran's President has the Bomb, but I know ours certainly does.

However, if you really want to see dancing with nutjobs...;-)

Okay....okay, but the underlying idea is this and unfortunately, it isn't a laughing matter (where this is leading).

Anyway, I will never consider Tucker in quite the same way....

I'm surprised Daily Show hasn't aired that.